Things I like this week (vol 17).

She kills me.

1. A few weeks ago, Tahn and I met my friend and her two Labradors at the lagoon and let the dogs swim. Tahn found the only mud on the beach and decided to roll in it right before we left. She refused to go back into the lagoon afterwards, forcing me to take a very muddy dog home. I still have mud in my car. Let’s just say we haven’t been back to the lagoon since.
2. I read The Glass Castle a few years ago and I can definitely say it’s one of the best books I’ve ever read. When I saw this New York Times article about the author, I was so interested to learn about her and her mother today.
3. I’ve found myself sitting at my computer most nights watching YouTube Beauty Vlogs. I also watch them with a gigantic bowl of homemade popcorn and it makes me so excited. I’ve found many new beauty products I want to try, and learned of some to stay away from. Part of me wants to get my own video camera and make my own YouTube Vlog channel. You down?
4. A few weekends ago, I went to Arizona to watch my cousin marry the love of her life. I originally couldn’t make it for a few reasons, so getting to go was really exciting. Highlights of the trip? Dancing with Buddy, the only child (only two-and-half-year old child) on the dance floor. That kid has moves. It was one of my favorite memories of my life.
5. Also at the wedding? My cousin, aka the little brother my sister and I never had but always wanted. He lived in CA last year and my sister and I got in the habit of seeing him almost every month. When he moved back east last fall, it was a sad day. It had been almost a year since my sister and I saw him so it was thethreebuddies reunited once again. The weekend was way too short and I keep trying to get him to move back to CA. One more thing I love about my cousin? He loves Tahn and made a point to tell many family members about how wonderful she is. Brownie points to anyone who loves my dog and gushes about her.
   

   I may or may not have screamed when I saw THIS GUY.

   

   Me, my mom, and my sister.

   

   Yes, I’m very pale & she’s very tan. Yes, we have the same parents. Nope, I don’t tan.

6. I saw this video on NPR, and I have to say, the innocence and logic of this toddler was powerful and profound.
7. Thanks to theSkimm, I found this little nugget of a video. At first I thought it was a SNL skit, but soon learned this lady is serious. I spent Thursday morning of last week watching it with my roommate and we couldn’t stop laughing. But, the woman is skinny as a rail, so the joke is on us, I guess.
8. From all my beauty blogs and Vlogs I read, I learned about Maybelline Color Tattoos. They go on smooth, and stay all day without creasing. The good news is that I AM IN LOVE. The bad news is that I will be buying every. single. color. Goodbye, money.

Happy Thursday!! xxxxoo

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The Worst Part of the Day

For reasons I won’t bore you with, I’ve been spending a lot of time home, not at work.  I’ve been home for the past three weeks, reading, cleaning, exercising, organizing and reading again. I’ve kept away from the TV because I find it just makes me want to nap. So instead of napping I’ve read 5 books, donated old clothing, and really organized my life. It’s been productive.

And since I’ve been home most of the day, I’ve been spending almost all of my time with the dogs – Tahnee (of course) and Maya (my roommate’s dog). And since the dogs are both Labradors, they follow me everywhere all the time.

The dogs have greatly bonded to me in these past few weeks; I am their alpha, their everything. Whenever I leave, they sulk and pout and are pitiful. This is a drastic difference from a few weeks ago when I would just get sad eyes. Now every time I leave they ache devastation, unsure of what to do or where to go.

I suspect they just sleep.

I leave at least once everyday – if not to exercise, but to also run errands. Each time worst than the next, each time they are more helpless and forlorn. It is the worst part of their day

I, on the other hand, leave them with no guilt. And for this I believe I am punished.

Everyday, around 3pm it starts.

Tahn will suddenly sit, staring at me.

Maya gets up and paces a bit.

I ignore them at first. “No eye contact” I tell myself.

Tahn’s piercing black eyes start working their way into my soul.

When I cannot take it anymore I tell them both to lie down.

They do. We have peace.

Until 3:30pm.

Tahn is up again, beady eyes on me.

Maya may bark once or twice.

Now I’m getting mad. “No!” I shout. “Not yet.” I scold.

They huff and puff  and lie down.

By 4pm, it gets really bad. (Like yesterday).

They no longer hear anything I say.

They double-team me.

Tahn pokes me with her cold nose and gives me the stare of death.

Maya goes from a high-pitched whine to a full bark attack.

I get incredibly angry. “NO! BAD DOGS!” I yell.

Tahn stares and pokes and Maya barks.

I consider putting them in the backyard and then remember Maya will bark even more and Tahn will eat sticks.

I consider putting them in their respective rooms and then remember Maya will destroy my roommate’s things in anger and Tahn will lie on my bed and pull back the covers and put her head on my pillow.

I scold them once more, really being firm. They coil in sadness.

I can almost hear them talking to each other, “Gosh, she didn’t have to be so mean, Tahn,”

“I know, Maya.”

At 4:30pm on the dot, the dogs are fed and the worst part of my day is over.

Today I’ll be at a coffee shop from 2:30pm to 5pm if anyone needs me.

Pouty Dogs

Things I like this week (vol. 9)

1. I hate how much I’ve been neglecting my blog but I’ve been working on a project that has been taking up 90% of my free time. I’ll be back soon.

2. I read this weeks ago. Weeks ago. I’m a moderator. What are you?

3. I love to watch Smash and envision Katharine McPhee back when she was on American Idol singing “Black Horse and the Cherry Tree”

4. I was sitting in the bath tonight reading O’s latest issue on decluttering, and I realized how badly I need to declutter, but I need to totally unpack. First things first.
5. I made these this weekend.

Delicious.

I’ve been eating 1 (or 2) every night since I made them on Saturday. They are so good that this evening I was sitting down to enjoy a cupacke and my DVR in my room wasn’t working. I walked back and forth from my living room to my room troubleshooting my DVR, dropping sprinkles all over the place. (Note: the DVR still isn’t working. I guess the cupcake didn’t help).

6. I went to the dog beach with Tahn, my roommate, and my roommate’s dog, Maya. It was maybe the best hour of my life. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Tahn that happy. Ever.

Tahn and Maya

7. This is how I have felt more often than not lately.

8. Drea’s post on living alone made me laugh and realize how similar I was when I lived alone. I rarely did dishes, clothes were everywhere, I usually walked around without some form of clothing on.

9. Tahn’s been putting herself to bed lately.

It’s a problem.

The space beside me

For 18 weeks, the space beside me was mostly vacant.

I had an occasional passenger in my car; a friend, a family member, a coworker.

I had friends I shared meals, movies, wine and conversations with.

I had company, but not my dearest friend.

After 18 weeks, Tahn finally came to live with me in San Diego. The weekend after I moved into my new (and permanent!!) place, I drove to the Bay Area and back in the span of 40 hours. It was exhausting, emotional, and worth every second.

Tahnee, minutes after we started our journey to San Diego, stopping for gas. Very anxious.

Starting to relax, hoping she's really staying with me this time. Anxiety diminishing.

Finally able to fully relax and rest. Anxiety almost gone.

Stopping at my favorite gas station with my Tahn. Anxiety free and loving life.

At our new home, with her new roommie and best friend, Maya.

The space next to me is now filled with two rambunctious, happy, playful dogs. And I couldn’t be more thrilled.

________________________________________________________________________

Many, many, many thanks to my dad for taking care of Tahn for the 18 weeks. He fed her, WALKED her (walked her more than she has ever been walked in her life) and gave her tons of love. If it wasn’t for him, I don’t know what I would have done. He’s the best.

Retro photo of my dad and Tahn. Circa 2008 (Isn't she a small little girl?!?!)

A few thoughts

The other night on my flight home from celebrating Buddy‘s first birthday, I thought about a few things:

• Above all, my family is the core of me. Hands down, they have been and will always be the most important people in my life. I can’t quite articulate my feelings for them, but I will sum it up to this: I love my family more than anything else in the world. They are my comforters, my nurturers, my challengers, and the people whom I sacredly love.
• I am continuously surprised how much I love Buddy. Saturday morning, I woke to my dad and Buddy walking down the hall, very sleepy. (And Tahn, OF COURSE). My brother and S2 had a holiday party on Friday night, so Buddy slept at my dad’s. He woke around 6am, and my dad brought him to me. Buddy was pretty confused why his Aunt Brittany was there and why he it was still dark, but he adjusted. I gave Buddy his bottle and then he was ready to go back to sleep. (Yes, you read that right. Buddy wakes up, eats, and goes back to sleep. He is my kind of child. Clearly, we are made of the same stuff). My dad thought it would nice if Buddy snuggled down with me and went back to sleep. After a short amount of time, Buddy finally settled in and fell fast asleep. (Details? Buddy was snuggled in as little spoon with his tiny baby feet squished in my legs. It was heaven on earth). In the past I’ve snuggled and slept next to other children; I was a nanny for 12 years – but snuggling with Buddy? The best sleep I’ve ever had. We awoke a little over two hours later, feeling great.
• Tahn is officially the best dog I have ever met. Yep, I said it. After being away from her for so long, meeting a bunch of other dogs, I can say that Tahn is amazing. She is kind, loving, obedient and fun. And? Next to Buddy, she’s the BEST SNUGGLER IN THE WORLD.

Snuggle Bun. 12am Saturday morning.

• Although I had some adjustments in my new life in San Diego, I really love it here. I can’t get over how beautiful it is here. Even today when it was raining and pouring, it was gorgeous. I love that I live 15 minutes from my sister and I get to see her at least once a week; I haven’t seen her this much for over 10 years. It’s really fantastic.
• The most important quality I look for in others is kindness. It all started a little about fours years ago when I walked into a dear friend’s home and on her entry way table she had a small sign, “Approach everything with kindness.” It was then I knew the man I walked through that very door with was not kind. It started off when I first realized on our second date that he was not kind to strangers,  three months in I realized he was not always kind in stressful situations, a year and three months I realized he was  not kind to Tahnee and ultimately, two years and one month into the relationship I realized he was not kind to me. I have since realized there are only two type of people in the world; those who make an effort to respond to others and in kindness and those who do not. I believe that many, many people are unkind. I’ve seen it for years. At work, in relationships I’ve been in and been witness to, in interactions with others. But, I’ve also met many people who are groundbreakingly kind. These people may not always be the best version of themselves, but they are authentic, real and intentionally kind. I strive to be this person everyday.
• I know one thing for sure: my instincts about a person, situation, or group of people have never been wrong. I can spot a bad apple from a mile away. Often I feel neutral about a person/situation/group of people. But when I have an incredibly bad feeling? I just know. After years of trying to ignore my intuition, I am finally embracing it and learning to appreciate it.

My verison of Rear Window and Tahn at the river

In the two weeks I was sick with strep throat, I spent a lot of time sitting on my couch. In between naps, baths and doctors appointments, I watched many hours of In Plain Sight and Bones on Roku box. The first week I was sick I had not yet discovered the beautifully, wonderful Tim Riggins and company from Friday Night Lights and surprisingly, I got pretty sick of watching In Plain Sight and Bones.

So instead of watching TV, I watched my neighbors the activity on my street.

Kind of like my very own version of Rear Window. Except, I’m not Jimmy Stewart and I didn’t have a male version of Grace Kelly to take care of me, nor did I witness a murder.

(image source)

But other then those little details, it was practically exactly the same situation. I became incredibly bored of being sick and resting all the time.

So just like my friend Jimmy, I spent many, many hours looking out my window.

I didn't have a camera.

(image source)

Let me tell you. Some interesting things go on during the day on my little street in Sacramento. I witnessed mostly comings and goings (I could give you my neighbor’s schedules, by the hour if you’re interested) but some other fun things happened too. (Please keep in mind these were “fun” for me: a bored, feverish, woman with an incredibly sore throat…)

On with the fun:

– I saw a group of my coworkers; oddly enough they took walks by my apartment building a few times.

– One of my neighbors took about three days to move, and I believe her friends and family that helped her moved thought I was a lonely, lazy, lady who sat on her couch for hours on end.

– Taxi Cabs apparently park on my street during the day to hang out.

– Lots of homeless people walk by. I would say about 50% of the people who walk by my apartment are homeless.

The second week of strep throat I spent even more time on the couch, but I discovered Friday Night Lights. Now, I realize I am about six years too late to jump on the Friday Night Lights bandwagon, but ohmygosh. I can’t really say anything more then Tim Riggins, Tim Riggins or… um yeah, Tim Riggins. It’s superb and makes me want to throw my whole “I want to marry a German man” thing right out the window and settle down with a nice Southern Boy. Ahem. Tim Riggins. (Don’t even say it. I know he’s a bad boy. I’m working on it).

Anyhoo. The good new is that I finally feel 100% better. I am so happy to be done with strep.

____

In other news…

I took Tahn to the river on Saturday with one of my friends and her two dogs. Tahn was pretty good, she came when I called her about 90% of the time (compared to her terrible display of behavior at the lake earlier this summer…) But listening to me 90% of the time is unacceptable, so let’s just say, recalls is something I will definitely be working on with Tahn in the next couple of months…

Tahn was SOAKED everywhere except her shoulders.

Here are two videos of her playing. Enjoy. 🙂

Video 1

Video 2

(I’m still too cheap to pay to have the videos on my blog, sorry!)

Things I like this week (vol. 4)

Well, I’m not quite 100% from my crazy case of strep throat, but I’m feeling much better than last week. I ended up spending over half my week on the couch, trying to rest. Although my throat felt so much better, I still had no energy. It was extremely frustrating. I hate missing work, and I hate feeling that so exhausted. The good news: I didn’t feel like I was run over by a train today after work, so I’m making progress!!

Anyways, on ward to things I like this week:

I was listening to NPR on Friday and heard this great segment on Quitting. Although it’s an hour long, I highly recommend it.

I am totally going to make this soon. Oh, and this.

I wish Tahn liked to snuggle under blankets like this dog. (Thank you to Lisa Rae for posting it first).

This story has been all over the blogosphere. Jennie has posted three posts since her tragedy – all remarkably beautiful and heartbreaking (one last dance, for mikey and 5:52 pm).

And, if you want something to cheer you up and bring you to tears, go see The Help, the movie (and read the book!) Both are great.

Happy Monday.

Oh! I almost forgot. I am participating in the 20 somethings blogswap, so you’ll find me over at Leann’s blog on Wednesday!

Things I like this week (vol. 3)

I was super-duper irritatingly excited to go back to work today. And use my brain. And not be in a puddle of my own sweat. I had loads of energy in the morning, lost some steam midday, and in the early afternoon, I was plum-tuckered out. I am now waiting for the good people at Round Table to bring me a pizza I just ordered. (I NEVER order pizza…) I may even roast some broccoli. In the meantime, here’s some stuff I like this week.

You know I’m obsessed with Taylor Swift. I could go on and on and on. I can’t wait to go to her concert in September, and my dad sent me this link of Taylor doing a cover of Eminem’s Lose Yourself at her Detroit concert. Apparently, she is paying tributes to artists at each city she goes to. 🙂

In my sick haze, I was so happy to get my signed copy of Stefanie Wilder-Taylor’s book, I’m Kind of a Big Deal – And Other Delusions of Adequecey in the mail from – the author herself! I just started reading it and it’s freaking hilarious. Did I tell you that I won it at a Mouthy Housewives giveaway!?! Stefanie talks about how Courtney Cox got her big break when she was invited to dance onstage with Bruce Springsteen in his “Dancing in the Dark” video. Of course, I had to Google it. It’s AMAZING. It’s in 1984. Courtney is a baby. And, I can’t get over Springsteen’s dancing.

Someone has clearly forgotten where she lives. Last week, I let her outside for a little while longer then normal (because I was really boring inside and all) and I found her upstairs, laying outside my neighbor’s door. The same thing happened this morning. I thought that I seriously lost the dang dog and almost lost my mind after calling her for 10 minutes. Only to find her asleep outside my upstairs neighbor’s door. She was only outside for 10 minutes.

Oh, did you hear? I have a new Blogroll! Of course, I am featuring all my favorite blogging ladies. Ladies who I would love to be. And guess what, some responded to my tweet about them! I felt so special. Like movie stars were reading my little old blog.

You can’t start a fire. You can’t start a fire without a spark. This gun’s for hire, even it we’re just dancing in the dark.

Letters from Tahn, part IV

I was out of town for work for three days and two nights, and my dear friend Summer took care of my sweet Tahn. Of course, while I was away, Tahn wrote me letters. Enjoy.

____

Dear Mum, today was super fun! I played in mud puddles, beat Aunt Copper’s dog in tug-o-war (finally!) and now I’m watching The Fantastic Mr. Fox. I miss you, but I’m having the best time. Oh, I really like Aunt Copper’s daughter, Honey (Mum, she is a CAT and lives in the house!). I kinda want to eat her, but that would upset Aunt Copper, so I just play with her instead. Can we get one?

Love, Tahn

____

Dear Mum,

Aunt Copper’s friend Chris came over last night.  I was SO excited to see him because he really likes to play fetch and always fills up the big pink tub for me to splash around in.  Since he got there so late he said I would have to wait until today.  He woke up a couple of times and looked a little freaked out to see my dark eyes staring back at him from the edge of the bed.  He even asked Aunt Copper if I needed to go to the bathroom, but she told him I was just too excited to sleep or wanted up on the bed.  Sure enough when he FINALLY woke up today he threw the ball around for me and I got to splash in the cool water.  He mentioned something about dognapping me?

Anyway, now I’m sleepy, which brings me to my next tale.  Today at lunch Aunt Copper came home.  She may have been a little surprised to find me asleep in the dog house, but it was so cozy I couldn’t help myself.  Aunt Copper’s  dog was sleeping under the hammock, which she says is her new favorite spot.  We’re having a lazy day, Mum.  Aunt Copper’s dog and I were so happy to see Aunt Copper and I told her so, but I was a good girl and sat politely while she ate her lunch.

Love,

Tahn xoxo

____

Dear Mum,

Aunt Copper says to tell you that I am being the BEST girl and she promises that her friend Chris was only joking about dognapping me.  I still don’t know what this dognapping is all about, but I think it must mean that he likes me?  Time for another nap; I have to rest up for another round of tug-o-war later.  Copper’s dog wants a rematch.  I can’t wait to see you tomorrow, Mum!!

Love,

Tahn xoxo

____

Dear Tahn,

I am so happy for you! It sounds like you are having a wonderful time. I’m glad Aunt Copper is taking care of you so well. But, tell her friend Chris that you are mine – but he can play with you anytime. Tahn, be a good girl and do not disturb anyone when they sleep tonight, okay? I’ll be home tomorrow night. I can’t wait to see you.

Love you lots,

Mum xxxxoooo

____

Dear Mum,
Aunt Copper took this photo of me early this morning.  She says I have the most beautiful dark eyes.  I know you said I’m not supposed to stare at people while they sleep, but I just can’t help it.  Please don’t be cross with me.  Aren’t I cute?!

I can’t wait to see you tonight!!  Drive safe.

Love,
Tahn  xoxo

____

(And one more…)

Hey MUM!

G-pa doesn’t know it but I’m using his Google Voice account! I’m having fun at Copper’s house.  I love her dog!!  I wish she had a name though…

Love,

Tahn

Thank you to Summer for taking such great care of Tahnee. Tahn was so happy when I picked her up (and dropped her off) and it took away all the sadness I feel when I usually leave her. I can’t be more grateful.

Tales of Tahn, Part III

This evening after I ate dinner, I took my sad sack of a dog to the dog park. (She sure gets sad when she’s had a day of no activity. Sad Sack Tahn breaks my heart). I took her to the park despite I had ANOTHER sinus headache. (Something in the air here in Sacto is really upsetting my sinuses…)

When we got to the dog park, I saw this:

Doesn't the water look so clean?

I knew as soon as Tahn got slightly hot she would go right in the kiddie pool. Tahn LOVES to swim. (Despite her bad behavior chronicled on previous posts).

Sure enough, before I knew it, in she went:

(well, you see, I’m too cheap to pay for the video to be inserted in my blog, so you’ll have to click this link to see it on youtube. sorry)

Tahn went in and out of the water for over an hour, being possessed by a demon each time. She had a ball. Nothing that dog likes more then water. (Well, maybe expect me. And food).

Tahn, SOAKED, in the parking lot waiting to go home...

Needless to say, she will not be sleeping next to me on my bed tonight…

____

Quick side note update!!!: Despite the part of me that said “go for it!” I totally resisted the Bad Boy dog owner at the park tonight. He had Brittany written all over him. And, his dog was adorable. But, I waved off his crunching (Never Been Kissed – Anyone? Anyone? Great movie) and moved on trying to get my soaking wet dog into my car, trying to not let her touch anything – BTW it was unsuccessful.

Quick side note II: Why are there only (usually) older, unattractive, kinda weird men at the dog park? How come no young guys have dogs? How come the dog park is FULL of young, beautiful women?!?!